jpbikerfreak's Blog

A phenomenon was discovered in New Guinea in the 1940s known as "cargo plane cults" by anthropologists. These cults sprang up in response to modern aged white men showing up and introducing their brand new way of life to the natives. It is a fascinating study of man's ingrained need for religion.

These cults observed that planes carrying bountiful cargo would arrive to supply the white men with everything they could want or need. They further observed that the white men had strange ways - and associated them with the planes' arrivals.

They saw that the white men would talk on a radio. They built towers to talk on these radios, which made the planes come. They came to the only logical conclusion a human could come to: the white men were communicating with their gods through the radio, causing the planes to show up.

As a result, a gospel quickly sprang up to explain the entire supernatural affair. A local leader is supposed to have direct contact and influence over the white men. The proof is that of course, soon after the white men arrived, and the native leader was assimilated by them, BLACK men similar to the white men began to appear.

Local cult leaders claim to have seen their native leader in visions. Interestingly enough, nobody knows for sure if the guy even existed in the first place. But the natives continue waiting for the glorious millenium of plenty - when the planes will come in for them.

Every year, they set aside a holiday to clear a field for the leader and his plane. They build towers, and use mach radios in which their mediums talk gibberish through and claim to receive message in return from the cargo Gods.

Now clearly these people have not been property educated about the Church of the Orbiting Teapot. I'd like to organize a mission to evangelize the teapot, and show them how they can have a personal relationship with Him. They must be saved from their ignorance. Now is the time.

Who's in?

Folks I don't normally dabble in the faith section, but I have to get this one off my chest.

I'm tired of the religious right neo-cons claiming we are a Christian nation. We are not now, nor have we ever been.

Thomas Jefferson, the author of our Declaration of Independence and chief influence of our constitution, had serious problems with Christianity. So did many of our other founding fathers. I'd even go so far as to bet that many of them would fall under the category of Altheist by today's standards.

For example, under Washington's administration, a treaty was drafted, and signed by John Adams. The treaty starts off, and I quote: "As the government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion; as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws of Musselmen..."

Thomas Jefferson himself - arguably the greatest American and libertarian thinker of all time, once said, "Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions. Ideas must be distinct before reason can act upon them; and no man ever had a distinct idea about the trinity. It is mere abracadabra of the mountenbanks calling themselves the priests of Jesus".

Barry Goldwater was the last true conservative. He got it right when he said, "Jerry Falwell needs a swift kick in the ass". Ever since the Goldwaters of the political world have been oustered from office, the religious right has hijacked our nation and revised history to claim that we are founded on Christianity.

Balderdash.